Shutting Doors.

So, last time I opened the door a crack. Turns out the draft froze someone out. My bad. Or not.
Resilience can be both strength and flaw. One’s got to know when to quit, you know. You cross a certain line and you just being silly. Then again, it’s one thing to know what to do, another to follow through. So yeah, I know what I ought to do, but will I? Trust me, I have no idea where these chips will fall either.
Moving on though, today’s about shutting doors. I’m not a slam the door shut person. Most people cheat in these things. They don’t shut the door, they just let someone else in. No loss, no grief. Pretty neat yeah? Not me. Takes me long enough to get the door open so…I have to deal with the interlude like regular people.
There comes a time though when the choice is made for you. The door is slammed shut and said person disappears real neat, like they never happened. Now, that’s very disorienting. At some point you wonder if you imagined their presence, cos trust me, I’m not even above vivid dreams. Eventually, you comfirm you didn’t for all the good that does you. Oh this is new ground for me. I’m doing this thing where I follow the stages of grief religiously. The shock’s gone now. I’m currently revelling in my denial/borderline bargaining. I’m fine. We’re good. We can work something out. Lool…of course we can’t, the depression awaits anyway so just…let a girl live for as long as she can. I plan on cheating tho, speed everything along, just fast forward the process. Get it over with, so I can go back to being numb, cool as a cucumber. I hate cucumbers. So, yeah…I’m not in a hurry to hit reset.


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